what a difference a year makes

I had to wait for the elevator this morning. While it was taking its sweet time creaking and groaning up three flights, I decided to check facebook on my blackberry. As soon as I nudged my phone to life I saw the date on the screen. And like a thunderbolt it hit me. It was exactly a year ago that Aaron left our apartment and went back to Minneapolis.

A year ago I drove him to the airport in silence. Embraced him at the curb and heard his voice in my ear telling me he would always love me. On that day there was little doubt that he would be a part of my life. Always. Forever.

Oh how far we’ve traveled in the last year.

So far I can’t even recognize the relationship anymore. I look at who we once were and it seems a like a lifetime ago. Surely these twelve months each had 90 days.

I am no longer entirely sure what I feel for him. I have so much to say on this topic. So much that has been foggy and fuzzy in the dark corners of my brains. Things that were brought into sharp, sharp focus this evening.

But I simply don’t have the energy to write about it. Not tonight.